Kerala, yet again!!

Here comes my much awaited post about the much awaited trip. Leaving IIT was not that easy as I thought it could be. For some its the campus, for some its the free internet, for some its the freedom, and for me it’s my friends. The sadness of leaving the insti on one side and the fear that I won’t get to meet them after I leave to Canada on the other side has completely occupied my mind. So, we had decided to go on a trip for one last time (I really hope its not the last one). Finishing my medicals really soon, I left to my favorite place, the god’s own country, Kerala!!! Kerala because……., I was missing junaid a lot, and this time I have more friends from kerala ๐Ÿ˜€ !!
The hyper excited me!

As I was travelling alone, I preferred to go in a second class A/C compartment. The adrenaline rush had already begun when I couldn’t get a cab until the last 45min. However, a very long super fast bike journey with my friend ET had saved me from that nervousness. The journey was for around 11 hours, believe me, that really felt like 24 hours or even more for me. The hyper excited brain of mine to meet it’s buddies, didnt let me sleep all night. It was around 4 in the morning when they said “Train No:12685 , Chennai to Mangalore super fast express has arrived at platform ‘4’ “. Could there be anything more sweeter than this? ๐Ÿ˜› I literally jumped from the upper berth and ran towards the exit.

A Beautiful Churchย 

Junaid and Thanzi picked me up from the station. 4.30am, cool breeze, the beautiful city, Kerala!! “Wohooo”.. I wanted to shout loudly!! Anticipation!!!ย 4 amazing days ahead. I totally felt like Kuttan returning home from work ๐Ÿ˜› (Ref: Bangalore Days).

Day1: A warm welcome from Femi (Jun’s sis) with a nice kaatam chai “black tea”. Even though I don’t drink Tea/Coffee, somehow I end up gulping each and everything when at Jun’s home. ^_^ I was waiting for jasu to wake up ^_^ so that I can give him my gifts. Aunt had prepared my favorite dish for breakfast, “Appam with coconut milk”. A perfect start for a perfect day! Jasu was quite shy initially but had started to jump around with me very soon.
Art by Jasu ๐Ÿ˜‰

I had decided to wear Femis dress that day to mix up with the people. Many said that i look fat and funny in that dress. Well, how fat can I look?? ๐Ÿ˜‰ I went on a walk to explore the town along with Junaid. I had blackmailed Junaid to help me buy a Kerala saree this time. We all went out that evening with thanzi and bought it finally. I couldn’t wait to try it on ๐Ÿ˜€

Day2:
It was a pleasant rainy day. Juns sisters were on a leave that day. With jasu dancing around and me jumping around him, the day went off so quickly!! Uncle had cut down jack fruits and coconuts for me. My tummy was so full with them and the yummy food aunt had cooked doesn’t need any mentions.

Monkeying around ๐Ÿ˜›
The new style, it’s jasu’s style.

It was around 5 in the evening and jun’s sisters vanished suddenly after they got to know that I will be leaving the next morning on a trip with all other friends. That was of course quite suspicious scene because they both went out alone ๐Ÿ˜› and none had an idea about it. And then I caught Jasu :D, the sweet little guy after so much asking had leaked that there was a surprise for me and that they were on it. Paavam he is!! He realized after telling me that he wasn’t supposed to. It’s so cute to see that little guy bang his head and regretting for that ๐Ÿ˜›

So, yes, they went out to get surprise gifts for me ๐Ÿ™‚

The Girly Evening.

There were so many emotions flowing(really flowing!) within us already. We then started to have a very girly evening. Hair-dos, youtube videos, dressing ups, selfies!! Of course, that was one fun-bonding evening. ^_^

Kerala Saree, YAAY!

As the night went on, all of us became very emotional. We had pained Junaid that I won’t be leaving the next day early morning and pressurized him to cancel the trip. Sudev, who had cancelled his family trip for this one. Shafeeq (leaving his ddp) had booked tickets to sudevs place only because the trip. Fight put by nea and especially nithya to convince their parents for this trip. Thanzi put fight for the car. After all this fight, jun was reluctant to even consider our emotions (Well, it’s not like he considered them ever :P, but this was for sure ๐Ÿ˜‰ ). However, if not that day, I had to leave the next day :/ So, we all wished each other good night and byes (First send off ๐Ÿ˜ฅ ).

Day3:
The day has arrived (Oh, let me just say it as Jun’s big day :P). As planned, Junaid, Thanzi and I left from Mavoor to Thrissur, Sudev’s place and from there all of us went to veega land at Kochi, to meet nithya and nea. The trip was kicked off with me being all sick and nauseous :P, could be due to my emotional times the previous night or the excitement about the trip. I really think it’s because of the first reason though XD.

The Yelling Batch ๐Ÿ˜›
So, anyway, this was my first visit to an amusement park and I was quite excited about it ๐Ÿ˜€ The day went off well, with me enjoying the water rides majorly (Love water and swimming :)). The rides included a huge log splash, water slides from as high as 5 storey building, a pool in which you can relax and several more fun rides.ย 
The one with all of us.
Due to my nauseousness I wasn’t really enthusiastic about the dry rides. Although, my friends did pull me into all sorts of rides including hair raising ones which made us stay upside down in the air. So, I’m guessing that I am not that weak as I thought to be ๐Ÿ˜› As we planned this trip during summer, it was a nice getaway from the hot and humid city climate. Situated on the top of a hill, this is a great place to escape the hustle and bustle of the city.
Second send off :/
Thanu kutti and ammu kutti ๐Ÿ˜€

At the end of the day, we all started back to drop nithya and nea on the way near Ernakulum and headed to sudev’s chechi’s place in kottayam.

Gay couple ๐Ÿ˜›

I was so happy to meet the other kutti, thanu there ^_^ After a long tiring day, there was so much fun with thanu and our gay couple (kidding), shafu and thanzi around ๐Ÿ˜›

Day4:

Marari marari marari…. ๐Ÿ˜‰

The final day has arrived. I had mixed feelings this day (really wanted to leave but was sad to leave). Sudev had planned a trip locally. We had visited Kumarakom bird sanctuary, kottayam backwaters, kumarakom lake and Marari Beach. Heading back to sudev’s home, we were quite late reaching our time points.

At sumi chechi’s house.

(The final send-off)

Shafeeq and I had booked my return tickets to chennai at 21:30 that night. Although, there was no time for proper send-offs, thanzi made my tears roll out by mentioning just one sentence which he was not supposed to “Prathyuuu… leaving already?”. And then the waterfall never stopped. Now, I really wanted to stay back ๐Ÿ˜› The plus point being, shafu and sudu bought me more chocolates so that I stop crying, but they didn’t succeed ๐Ÿ˜€ Who cares, I had chocolates.

The sad journey back to chennai and to our routine lives had started. I perceived that it was going to be a nice trip, it indeed was a memorable one in various ways for me. The best things in life are the people we love,the places we’ve been and the memories we’ve made along the way!!!

The five of us! ๐Ÿ˜€

Signing off with a bunch of memories!

Excitement+Fear+Anxiety!

You really don’t want me to start explaining the infinite thoughts running through my mind at this moment, really not. Although, I was always interested in pursuing higher education, especially in abroad countries and even decided on the profs I wanna work with in future, when the moment is in front of me, I really don’t wanna go. I wanna cry out loud “Please don’t send me, I want to stay here”. But, I also wanna reach my goals without any disturbances.

As I kept searching to find some related posts which might be helpful for me, I came across the following which summarized most of my feelings. Hoping that this will be helpful for many like me.

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Leaving home to study abroad is not like going for a college field trip or a sleepover at your best friendโ€™s. You will be gone for a considerable period and it should not make you paranoid to see your family members getting emotional time and again as the date of your departure nears.

Similarly, you must keep your cool when close and distant relatives (who maybe have no real influence in your life) start sermonizing on the dos and donโ€™ts of the new place even when theyโ€™ve never left their own city, let alone the country! In the part of the world I come from, you will receive their advice again and again… and again, till they see you off at the airport. (Beware; they may well call you and continue preaching even after you arrive.)

Although you will probably be overwhelmed with excitement at the prospect of starting a new chapter in your life, itโ€™s also natural to feel emotional about leaving home to study abroad. Thereโ€™s no harm in being sentimental, but you donโ€™t want to spend your last few days or weeks getting irritated with those around you, or feeling sad at the prospect of being far away from family and old friends.

Here are my tips to guide you through this emotional phase:

1. Listen!

Whatever those around you are telling you, listen. Yes, you read it correct: listen to them. Make them feel satisfied, as it is their love for you that is forcing them to act weirdly. They care about you and want you to be safe. This doesnโ€™t mean you have to actually act on their advice, but it does mean you should respect it.

2. Spend time with friends & family

While you will make new friends when you study abroad and have loads of new activities to keep you busy, nostalgia will one way or another bother you. Collect as many good memories as possible. Spend time with your loved ones and cherish all the memories; in those times when you feel homesick and unable to concentrate on anything, they might lift you up.

3. Remember they are rooting for you

You may be struggling leaving home to study abroad; you have a room to keep clean, assignments to complete, laundry to do, maybe a part-time job to manage your little expenses, and when you are done doing all that you have to prepare your meal. Sounds devastating, but this is what gives you invaluable life experience. Enjoy it and know that your friends and family are rooting for you.

They trust in you and believe you have the potential to make it big. One of my cousins wrote to me when I told him about my departure: โ€œI am sure you are excited, nervous and perhaps even a little weary all at the same time which is entirely natural โ€“ just be positive and re-mindful that weโ€™re all rooting for you and that things will always fall into place.โ€ This is my advice to you. You can choose to ignore it if you like!

4. Have fun & take care of yourself

You are in a new place, new environment and a different culture. Enjoy every bit of it; this time might never come back. But you have to be responsible as well. Even if you are not following the instructions of your family and friends, you must take care of yourself in the best possible way. You are not a kid anymore so make all the decisions carefully and make your experience worth remembering.

Last but not the least; never forget those who care for you when leaving home. Keep in touch while you study abroad. Even an email once in a few weeks/months can suffice.

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Kudos to the writer!

From D/O to W/O.

She suddenly woke up in the middle of the night. The sudden anxiousness and terror was in the air surrounding her. Not very late that she started agitating about this, and realized the big thing happening to her.
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It wasn’t like any fancy doll wedding she was organizing during her childhood. As she started pondering, she glanced on her life up to date, the free, independent, ambitious, pampered daughter of her mom and dad. She finally understood that it’s all going to be different.
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She was conscious that she will not be free to do whatever she wants. The fear that none of her plans will ever be made without wondering about what her husband or in-laws will say, just instilled the anti-marriage thoughts in her mind. The mere thought of changing home (sometimes even city or country), family, entire lifestyle, etc., gave her a terrible headache. The constant reminders from others saying things like “your mother-in-law will not bear your tantrums like your mom does”, was simply enough to freak her out. The expectations filled up post the wedding, like have kids, take care of them, save for their education, take care of your new family, behave according to them etc.ย 
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Similar to most of the girls who think that getting married means an end to their ambitions and career plans. She started to wonder about the halts or breaks in her career for which she had worked so hard all her life. This stands true at least in the situations where the woman has to leave her city or country, as she might not get the job in a new place immediately.
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The responsibilities of a woman change and increase manifolds after marriage. She thought about a long list of new relatives that comes along, whom she has to deal with. And, even if she dislikes them, she has to pretend just the opposite of what she feels. It is not just these new relations that scares her, but the adjustments that she would have to make with an entire set of new people after marriage.
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She was worried that she would be sold (the dowry) to slavery and sex and that her identity would totally change. It is about the change of identity that she had lived with for her entire life, which bothers her more than anything else.ย 
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It was all different, and suddenly, she found herself shedding tears. She understood that she wasn’t in a stage in her life to make any such commitment. But the norms of the society instilled into her parents forced her look into this strenuous part of her life. Her mantra of ‘my life, my choice, my goals‘ was about to come an end.ย This is not going to be a small change-over like before. She was all helpless. And she killed herself all night thinking as to why she was born as a girl.
#This might not be applicable to everyone. But, at-least in Indian scenario, the marriages always demand more than necessary. It is not a person to person thing, but a family to family and more families. Especially the arranged marriages situation has become like “Their way or Highway” kind. Well, they do have their own strengths and flaws.